Ask Papabear: The First Advice Column for Furries!
  • Home
  • Letters
  • Write Me
  • Disclaimer
  • Good Furry Award
    • Nomination Form
    • Lifetime Achievement Award
    • 2023 Nominees
    • 2022 Winners and Nominees
    • 2021 Wiinners
    • 2020 Winners
    • 2019 Winners
    • Good Furry Theme Song
  • Advertise
  • About
  • Gifts
  • Testimonials
  • Fan Art
  • Resources
  • Ask Papabear
  • Home
  • Letters
  • Write Me
  • Disclaimer
  • Good Furry Award
    • Nomination Form
    • Lifetime Achievement Award
    • 2023 Nominees
    • 2022 Winners and Nominees
    • 2021 Wiinners
    • 2020 Winners
    • 2019 Winners
    • Good Furry Theme Song
  • Advertise
  • About
  • Gifts
  • Testimonials
  • Fan Art
  • Resources
  • Ask Papabear

Very Short "Honeymoon Period" Indicates This Couple Need to Slow It Down

10/7/2013

0 Comments

 
Hiya,

I need a little relationship advice... Me and my girlfriend have been in a relationship for a couple of weeks, but I just feel we need time away from each other. I know as my cat fursona, I can be independent. Her fursona is a wolf-dog and she can be very needy and sexual at times. I honestly wouldn't mind it (because I'm sometimes very dirty minded), but this is pretty much constantly and at the most inappropriate times. Basically, neck biting, boob grabbing, and butt grabbing are a daily thing from her; as for me, I'm all hugs. What makes it worse is that it's a public thing and I know how some people are easily triggered by this display of affection. I like her, but we still know so little about each other.

Please help me, Papa Bear!

Florance Sphynx

* * *

Dear Florance,

Gosh, only a couple of weeks and you already need a break from her? Usually, new lovers can’t get enough of each other for at least the first year or two, or what is often called “the honeymoon period.” If you already are in need of a break, then that is a strong sign you might not be with the right person. You’ve already pointed out how your feline vs. canine personalities don’t mesh.

But I won’t tell you that you should break it off just yet. You also say “we still know so little about each other.” So, first try to get to know your girlfriend better. She, clearly, needs to get to know you better, too. She doesn’t understand how you are uncomfortable with public displays of affection that involve more than hugging. You can start there, but you should also just talk about all other things not related to sex and see if you really do click as a couple or not.

Sometimes people fall head over heals into a relationship before they know what they are getting into. A lot of this can start because there is some sexual spark between two people and they mistake that for love. As you said, you can get pretty dirty minded at times, and perhaps it was that period of lust that got her going, too, and caused her to think that you were on the same page sexually.

So, now is the time to, as they say, slow things down. It might have started hot and heavy, but take the time to take things to a deeper level. I wouldn’t say “take a break,” meaning not see each other for a while, because that won’t help your relationship; just move at a slower pace.

With luck, you will discover things about each other that you didn’t know and that you both really like, and you will both be better for it. But, if you find that you really have nothing much in common, then better to find out now rather than a year or two later when you have invested a lot more of your heart into it and the breakup is more painful.

Bon Chance!

Papabear

0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Go to Papabear's Facebook page

    RSS Feed

    Categories

    All
    Addiction
    Art And Literature
    Careers
    Coming Out Furry
    Crime And The Law
    Editorial
    Family Issues
    Friends Issues
    Furry Definition
    Furry Issues (other)
    Fursonas
    Fursuiting
    Health
    Illness And Death Issues
    LGBT And Gender Issues
    Loneliness Depression Anger
    Love And Relationships
    Money
    Odd And Ends
    Politics
    Religion And Spirituality
    Roommates
    School Life
    Self Improvement
    Sexuality And Sex
    Social Networking
    Work And The Workplace

    Picture
    Picture
    An excellent article on coming out LGBT to Christian parents.
    Picture
    My Rainbow Ark is a site for and about LGBT furries and religion and how they are not incompatible.

    Picture
    A note on comments: Comments on letters to Papabear are welcome, especially those that offer extra helpful advice and add something to the conversation that is of use to the letter writer and those reading this column. Also welcome are constructive criticisms and opposing views. What is NOT welcome are hateful, hurtful comments, flaming, and trolling. Such comments will be deleted from this site. Thank you.

Home

Letters

Write Me

Disclaimer

About

Copyright © 2012-2023