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Papabear Note: You might notice I have not posted a lot of letters lately. This is mostly because I don't like repeating myself and I don't think readers need to see the same issue brought up repeatedly: namely, "How do I tell my parents/family/coworkers/friends I am a furry?" I have answered this question literally hundreds of times by now. I still answer it privately in emails to furries who ask, but I am no longer posting these letters here. You can see some of my previous replies here, and I will also address it one more time in The Furry Book. Thank you.
Latest Letter: June 15, 2018Dear Papabear,
So I just recently found out about the furry community, and I feel that it speaks to me on a level which I have never felt before. All my life, I have been looking for this sort of community, but I might have a problem. As much as I love all furry creatures, I find myself most attracted to insects - they fascinate me as well as make me just feel so warm and fuzzy inside. The feelings that other furries have described about mammals, I feel about insects, the cockroach in particular. I was just wondering and hoping that even though I feel such an attraction to insects (specifically cockroaches), I can still be a part of the furry community. In the past, I have only been able to dress up in my roach costume alone, and no one else has been able to share in my joy. Also, I am kind of confused as to if the furry community is okay with having a kind of sexual attraction to animals. Whenever I see a particularly good-looking insect, I just can't help but get that kind of hot adrenaline rush that comes with it. I would never, of course, want to ever engage in sexual activity with an insect, but maybe someone dressed AS an insect. Maybe that's too much and not normal though. It seems like some other furries take their furriness into their sexual lives though, and I would love to be able to do the same in my cockroach suit. Anyway, thanks so much! Roachie (age 26) * * * Dear Roachie, Yes, you are clearly new to the fandom because you evidently have never heard of a famous furry named Uncle Kage (real name, Dr. Samuel Conway). Kage has been a prominent voice in the furry community, being one of the organizers of Anthrocon (the world’s largest furry convention) in Pittsburgh and as a kind of self-appointed spokesfur for the community (if you google him you will find videos of him talking to the media about what furries are). And his fursona? You guessed it: a cockroach. Kage is by profession an organic chemistry researcher. As a scientist, he apparently came to admire the cockroach as a species that is a survivor, and that’s why he chose this insect as his fursona. (I believe I’m recalling this correctly; been a while since I heard him speak at a furcon.) I have seen other insects in the fandom, too. Usually, species such as bees and butterflies, but I’ve seen others such as various beetles, moths, wasps, spiders (arachnids, of course), and so on. So, yeah, you can most certainly have an insect or arachnid as a fursona. Kiddo, there are no such thing as restrictions when it comes to designing your fursona. You could even create a hybrid that is part insect and part mammal or reptile or whatever. And, yes, I have seen some furry porn involving insects, too. Psychologists call this formicophilia. When it involves real-life insects, the arousal might be about the stimulation of having hundreds of tiny legs tickling your body all over, or perhaps even an S&M fantasy of being stung or bitten. Now, you said you would not be into that and would be aroused more by a human-sized insect, perhaps as a fursuit. The psychology behind this might have to do with the exotic, alien encounter of having sex with such a being—or the taboo behind it—which creates a sexual tension that people could find enticing. Hey, to each his own. As Papabear always says, as long as you aren’t hurting anyone, just have fun with it and stop worrying. Papabear |
The reason The Furry Book (see below) has been delayed is that I had to finish my late husband, Jim's book first. It is now available. If you are interested in California, this is a very fun and informative read.
 The Furry Book will be a guide to the fandom for audiences including new furries, experienced furries, family and friends of furries, the media, and the furry curious.
COMING IN 2018!
THE FURRY BOOK (Cover art by Charleston Rat) Attention Artists! Would you like to promote your work and make some money? Click Here. 
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