My question to you is: IS there a such thing as being TOO YIFFY?
I asked this on a facebook group, Furries. Reason I asked this was because of most of the local younger furs are telling me I'm too YIFFY. But in turn they are doing the same thing, showing affections towards each other in public, and it's cool for them. But when I do it, I'm called perverted.
* * *
Ain’t THAT a double standard they’re laying on you! LOL. So, it’s okay for them to be yiffy but not you because you’re older than they are? That’s a big ol’ “WTF?” in this bear’s book.
(Now, to be clear to my readers, Coony is simply talking about public displays of affection, such as hugging and kissing, not yiff in terms of fornication.)
Papabear's feeling here is that you are being discriminated against because of your age. They are essentially saying that it is only cool for cubs to kiss and hug and greymuzzles should stand back, because, I guess, we might remind them of their parents, and who wants to think of their parents being affectionate in public?
The young furs in your group need to get over themselves. It really gets my goat--to use and old expression (UPMO, for those cubs who love abbreviations so much)--whenever young people think they are superior. So, I'm gonna start a new feature here, called my Weekly Bear GRRRR at the world. Here's this week's
WEEKLY BEAR GRRR!
"Youth is not a virtue, nor is old age a sin." --Papabear
Of course, Papabear is taking the risk of insulting a large part of my readership. So be it. I am not saying all youth are like this, not at all, but there is a problem with many young people thinking they are the bee's knees (shit don't stink). I'm not blaming them entirely for this attitude. Today's Americans are part of a neurotic society in which kids are not challenged because we don't want to hurt their self-esteem, they go to schools that are dumbed down so everyone can get a passing grade (I mean, they allow calculators in math class, for God's sake!), and they are part of a youth-worshipping culture that is geared entirely to teens and twenty-somethings when it comes to TV, music, movies, and so on. So, no wonder they think a lot of themselves. They are constantly told they are amazing, even in those cases when they don't deserve it.
On the other paw, we have a huge disconnect where a large part of the young population is still suffering from depression and low self-esteem when they cannot match up to the illusion of beauty and popularity displayed on the glowing screen. I see this a lot in my column. This is fortified by bad parenting (there's a LOT of that going on) in which parents are falling down on the job of raising their kids, many parents even being abusive to their children.
The result: by and large, from what Papabear has seen, we have very few well-adjusted young people in this country. I'm not blaming them by any means. They are at a gross disadvantage because they are being poorly raised and educated. I think, actually, that many kids recognize this, at least subconsciously, and that is why they act out or, perhaps, become furry: they are seeking an escape from what their instincts tell them is a psychotic society.
This is a long, desultory explanation to get around to my point. Coony, you are basically the target of a neurotic society. These young furs have been brainwashed into thinking that being older is an ugly thing and that older people shouldn't be affectionate. Perhaps their own parents are nasty people and so they cannot come to grips in their mind that not all older people are cold, cruel, or uncaring, so they mock your actions (mocking is an instinctive defense when people are ignorant of or confused by a behavior they cannot comprehend). Perhaps they just buy into the whole Hollywood image (you don't see old people kissing on screen much) and are amazed that you don't fit that mold.
In short, YOU are not the problem and you are NOT a pervert, Coony. This world NEEDS more affection, more love, more hugs (as my friend Pawfan would say), and more kisses. We need LESS hate, less prejudice (including ageism), less callousness and cruelty.
Papabear happens to know you personally, Coony, and you are a sweet sweet furry. Don't ever change. You should set yourself as an example to these cubs and pups!
Here are some hugs and kisses for you (young people, avert your eyes or they might melt in your eye sockets!)
HUGS, KISSES, LICKS, YIFFS!
10/24/2012 03:03:57 am
10/24/2012 06:59:56 am
I distinctly remember my first boyfriend at the age of 14. OMG was I IN LOVE and no grown up could ever stand the intensity of that feeling...or so I though. Me and him practically invented sex you know!
10/24/2012 06:12:43 pm
There needs to be more hugs! And in extreme cases....Relaxing pawrubs! The pawrubs part, pawfans are known to promote.
10/26/2012 09:14:16 pm
10/27/2012 03:15:35 am
Well, yes, we are all neurotic in some form, old and young alike. Not everyone is one way or the other, damaged or sane. You're right that we are all damaged in some form or another, but I never called anyone stupid or narrow-minded. We are all victims of this society, and that is something no one can escape.
"They are at a gross disadvantage because they are being poorly raised and educated." "poorly raised and educated" poorly educated
10/28/2012 12:46:34 am
Dear Flinch: "Poorly educated" is not the same as stupid. You can be a very smart person who did not receive a good education. I give you Albert Einstein, whose teachers did not know how to deal with his brilliance and did not educate him the way he should have been as a young boy, so he did very badly in school early on. There are three types of human mental capacities: knowledge, intelligence, and wisdom. Knowledge is just repeating facts, which gets you a good score on Jeopardy. Intelligence is knowing how to interpret facts and solve problems. And wisdom is knowing whether or not to use knowledge and intelligence and when to do so. So, you are not stupid if you got a bad education, not necessarily, anyway. Neither is your interpretation of narrow-minded correct. What I was trying to get at with the whole Hollywood image is that people can be brainwashed by what they are told and shown repeatedly. Now, if you are narrow-minded, you are incapable of overcoming a prejudice or mindset. I believe that young people CAN overcome that mindset, if they are given better examples.
I feel that the prompt-based way of thinking taught in any K-12 school has absolutely nothing to do with being social. I also feel that even the freedom to ask more questions and be more of a critical thinker in college has little to do with learning not to judge people and developing friendship. This applies to both schools these days and the schools that existed centuries ago. Take it from someone who's been going to school recently, we're not constantly told we're winners and we're not given credit where it's not due. Education seems the same. There's bad grades when you don't do your work, there's bullying, there's cliques, there's bias based on race or gender, etc.
10/28/2012 06:15:35 am
That's terrific input, Flinch, thank you. I should apologize to my readers. This has been a very rough few days for me and it got me irritable and feeling negative, and that came through a bit in a couple of my recent letters. Just proves I'm far from perfect. I try to always stay upbeat and helpful, and I kind of dropped the ball a bit. So, I am sorry if I got a bit too down on anyone. Thanks for understanding.
2/13/2013 05:07:31 am
Personally, I'd love to have a gray-muzzle PDA me; Ever since I started looking at Furry, and other... Stuff, in general, I realized I was gravitating towards the older end of the spectrum.
12/23/2014 07:54:28 pm
(WARNING: NSFW / XXX-themed / SUGGESTIVE POST BELOW)
12/27/2014 11:07:08 am
*blush* hehe, thanks!
12/23/2014 07:57:15 pm
(typo fix: I'm a sucker ~for~ older men. Better flow of sweet intimacy!)
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