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Should He Tell This Couple He Suspects One of Them of Infidelity?

6/23/2014

2 Comments

 
Dear Papabear,

A few months back a couple I was friends with broke up with each other. I'm still in contact with one of them, a guy (Wolf), but I haven't spoken to the girl (Tiger) since. Recently, I found artwork online of her and another guy (Husky) saying they were mated and the images are dated from the time Wolf and Tiger were going out. They were together in real life as well as in character. Even though it's possible that Husky and Tiger were not together in real life, I feel like I should do something. What should I do? Tell Wolf? Confront Tiger? Tell Husky that she wasn't 100% faithful?

Please help,
Kyle (age 27)

* * *

Oh, dear dear Kyle....

It is never a good idea to get into another couple’s affairs, especially in matters of infidelity. For one reason, you might be wrong about what’s going on here (you don’t really know the full story, I’m sure, and even admit yourself that Husky and Tiger might not have actually been together) and if you go tell Wolf about it and are wrong, you will make him look stupid and jealous and you will definitely get Tiger hating you, quickly followed by Wolf getting mad at you for making him look like a fool.

Even if you are correct about this, it is none of your business and will still likely result in both of them resenting you, even Wolf. Why? Because, even though it isn’t fair, people have a way of blaming the messenger.

If you are dead-set on telling someone about this, start with the unfaithful party, Tiger. Tell her you believe she was unfaithful and give her a chance to explain herself. You might be surprised by the answer. Once you have that information, it will help you to know how to proceed, or if you should proceed. 

Another, even more cautious approach, would be to have a chat with Wolf and Tiger, without saying you know anything, make sure they know that you are their friend and they can talk to you about anything if they need a shoulder to lean on.

Be very careful how you tread because you stand the risk of losing your friendship with them if you pursue this. There’s a difference between being a friend and being a nosey busybody.

Hugs,

Papabear
2 Comments
Max Goof
6/23/2014 10:25:07 pm

Am I reading that correctly? He is saying that he knows a couple who are no longer seeing each other, and that one of the two may have been unfaithful while they were, and he doesn't know if he should say anything?

What makes him think the wronged one doesn't already know? Maybe the infidelity is the reason why they are no longer a couple.

Even if the wronged one doesn't know, they are no longer a couple. At that point, what difference does it make?

I think this fur really needs a chill pill.

Reply
Papabear
6/24/2014 12:21:49 am

You know, Max, I'm an idiot on this one. I was looking so closely at the problem I forgot the obvious. Thanks for using a sledgehammer after I tried to knock down the wall with a tweezer.

Reply



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