Recently Divorced, He's Having Trouble Getting Back in the Game

Hello there, Papabear,

I am 27 and recently got divorced about 6 months ago in a very terrible way. Well, that isn’t the real predicament. Though after the divorce I was looking at a few non-furry dating sites like match.com, PlentyOfFish, etc. Though I have been a furry since 2009, thus after I got married I let the furry part slip away from me . Thus after the divorce I decided to return to furry section. I haven’t had much luck before I got married to find anyone. (By the way, I am hetrosexual). But yet I am back at square one before I met this person I married, now with a divorce sign hanging above my head. I didn’t have luck on the sites mentioned and was wondering if there is any other dating sites besides Pounced, Furfling, or Furry Mate. And if so is there someone out there for a divorced furry such as myself?

This part above is my question/predicament I would like to give advice to furries as well in this message letter. Before I was told of my divorce, which I didn’t see coming at all, my ex-wife and her family took me to an all-you-can-eat buffet before telling or mentioning about the divorce. No, I am not trying to be papa bear here or some love doctor, but it is better to speak of a divorce or break up sooner than later because the longer you wait the more it will hurt.... Even if you don’t know how the other person reacts or how they feel, it’s better to tell them sooner than later. Because when later comes, that’s when the other person doesn’t want anything to do with you, talk to you, or even be friends with you. This concludes my advice and question, though I don’t know if I should have shared the advice, though.

Skullking LoneWolf

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Dear Skullking,

Sorry to hear about your divorce. Divorces are always painful, even the most amicable of them. I agree with you that if you know you are going to divorce (or otherwise break up with) someone, you should tell them as soon as possible because, as you say, the longer you wait, the harder it will be for the other person, and that’s just cruel. It was also very unclassy for her family to break the news at a buffet restaurant. Such things should be between the two partners and discussed in a private setting. (It’s okay to share advice here :-)

Now, about dating sites. For mundanes, there are some that are designed specifically for divorced people who are seeking love, such as http://www.divorcedpeoplemeet.com/. I think, if I were you, I would start there before looking at furry sites, which are mostly populated by young furs who have never married in the first place. At 27, you are getting close to the “greymuzzle” stage, which is generally considered to be anyone 30 and older, so you might want to go on some of the Facebook furry groups and look for older furs with more experience in the world of marriage and divorce.

Remember, don’t put too much pressure on yourself to find a new partner. Let it happen naturally, and be yourself! :-)

Good luck!

Papabear