Playing Is Important

Papabear,

So I understand this has been covered many times, but there is a big problem for me that I'd like to address, and that's that my parents think fursuiting is dumb. I joined the fandom when I was 11, and I've been hiding my interest about it. When I first showed my dad my fursona, he said it was "dumb" and that I should be spending more time doing work. It hurts because I've been saving money to get a fursuit, but every time something comes up where I have to use my savings, and I start all over.

The main point is that my parents don't like the idea of me spending so much time on what I love, because they think it's a dumb concept, and that it's too expensive. I am feeling down about it, and I'd really like a little help, even if it's just telling me best ways to save up.

Anonymous (age 14)

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Dear Furiend,

We have two questions here: how to address your parents and how to get money for a fursuit. Your parents believe that work is more important than your "dumb" interest in furries. You don't specify why they think it is dumb, but it sounds like they see your interests as frivolous and you should be focusing on studying and, I suppose, getting a job, even though you are only fourteen. This is a problem that is widespread in modern American society. Parents no longer see the value of hobbies and play. Instead, they take away play too early and, if anything, allow for only structured activities such as being on a soccer team or taking dance lessons.

But playing is important. In fact, there are scientific studies that show it is important and all young people should indulge in play (and 14 is not too old to do so). Here is a paper all about the importance of play in physical, social, and emotional development. Play can take all kinds of forms, and indulging in being active in the fandom is just one, but a legitimate one. Therefore, it is not "dumb." People who grew up being allowed to have unstructured play grow up to be healthier and more sociable than those who do not. It can even help with your creative and cognitive skills. As the saying goes, "All work and no play makes Jack (or Jill) a dull boy/girl."

Life is not all about work. It is not all about school. Play is important.

As for raising money for a fursuit, well, yes, they can be expensive. Instead of buying a new, full suit, how about getting a used one or a partial? You'll save a lot. As for the money you'll still need, do you have a way to make a little money? Do yard work or other chores or dog walking? Saving money is all about discipline. I'm not sure what you mean by "something comes up" that forces you to spend money you are saving, but if the "something" is not an emergency, then you need to learn how to prioritize. What is more important? Saving for your furry hobby or spending money on something else? If furry is more important, then don't waste money on things that are not essential.

Hope that helps, and good luck!

Papabear