Let's Try Not to Lose the Standards of Fursuit Etiquette, Shall We?

Hi Papabear!
 
I have a question to ask and its about speech and fursuiting. I noticed that wile out of fursuit no one talks to me or acknowledges my presence. I just shrug my shoulders and think that maybe they are just too busy conversing with others. So this is normal for me. But as soon as I put on that head it seems like now everyone wants to talk to me. It gets me all confused because its like why talk to a fursuiter when you know that it hard to talk with them. They say something like "What? I can't hear you. Speak up!" It's quite hard to speak up with something is one's mouth. It also over times strains and bruises the vocal cords when trying to yell as loud as I can to make the non fursuiter here what I have to say. Then as I take off the head they stop talking or just walk away. It's like what is this? Are they playing some sort of mind game?

I just don't know if the non-suiters find it offensive when it comes to speech other than vocal. Friendly gestures while fursuiting can be a part of speech too. I experienced that scenario a few weeks ago at a furmeet. No one wanted to talk but as I got dressed up and put on the head that's when they wanted to say something. This one person kinda found it offensive just the way she used her tone of voice. "It's like why dont you converse or talk with others?" I'm like duh I'm in fursuit here. Stuff like that just ruins the magic and fun of being in character. Didn't want to say anything to the admin. staff about because I didnt want to ruin their happiness. She did that quite a few times too. I guess thy just have no idea how to RP in real life situations. I don't like to talk that much and that is why I use the fursuit. It's sort of like when you have your head phones are ear phones. Turn on the radio or listen and watch movies on the net and yup! People start making conversation and it's like "Hello! I'm listening to something here. I can't hear you" It's like do I have a sign on me that says please talk to me when I'm busy. I've seen people do this to others with fursuits. Not all but some. The person doesn't have fursuit on yet and nobody's around, but put it on and now everyone wants that person to say something. These people had a lot of time and opportunity to talk to that person beforehand but wasted that time doing something else.
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I guess what I 'm trying to ask is Why do non suiters not use the time wisely to talk to the suiter before they walk around and perform? 
 
Cave (age 29)
 
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Hello, Cave,
 
As the fandom grows, it is apparent that the fursuiting etiquette that was once common knowledge is being increasingly abandoned or just forgotten (or not taught at all). Now, I have only been fursuiting since 2010, but even then these things (below) were told to me about proper fursuiting, so it seems to be very recently that this has gotten out of hand.

To all of you out there, fursuiters and non-suiters alike, here is a quick list what used to be, at least, fursuit etiquette:

1. You DO NOT dehead in public (except in cases of emergency, such as you are going to pass out from heat exhaustion unless you dehead). If you are getting overheated and don’t want to completely remove your fursuit, that is the reason furcons provide the headless room, complete with fans and cold water. Dehead there, cool off, put the head back on and go outside again. Why is deheading forbidden in public? Because by keeping yourself in fursuit you are creating a fantasy that comes to life, which is at the core of the fun of fursuit performance. Deheading destroys the fourth wall, as they say in theater, and ruins the illusion of your being a furry.
2. Unless you are very experienced as a fursuiter (and sometimes even then), you should always have a handler nearby. Handlers are buddies who help you not run into things, trip over stuff, negotiate stairs, and keep people from being annoying—such as touching, hugging, kissing, tugging on you without permission.
3. Similarly, fursuiters should not approach, hug, etc. people unless they are okay with it. This is especially true with children unless parents are fine with it.
4. Non-suiters should always ask permission to take photos.
5. NEVER sneak up behind (or even to the side) of a fursuiter and then make contact with them. Fursuiters have bad or no peripheral vision, and this can be very startling and unnerving.
6. When you are in fursuit, you should be IN CHARACTER. You are no longer Bob Smith or Jane Jones. You are now your fursona and you should behave as your fursona.
7. Talking: It used to be that almost no fursuiters talked while in character, and communication was always done with gestures and maybe some animal noises or (a la Telephone) cute squeaks and such. This was in the tradition of Disney mascotting in which characters such as Mickey Mouse never spoke to guests even though the cartoon mouse could talk. Another reason was that most fursuit heads did not have articulating jaws, so it looked weird to talk. That has changed somewhat now, especially with improvements to costumes (Grubbs’ jaw moves, for example), but when you speak you really should do so in character.
8. Non-suiters note #7: If you want to chat with the performer as him/herself, do so when they are not in character; if you want to chat with the fursona, that’s fine, but don’t expect a conversation from that person as their real selves.

 
The reason why you find people wanting to talk to you in your fursuit, Cave, is this: fursuits break down the communication barrier by making people more at ease. You see, when an unfamiliar face approaches someone and tries to initiate a conversation, this is a very real thing and can be intimidating to some people, especially for those who are socially shy, which is a common issue in the fandom. Furries (and mundanes) tend to form cliques and circles of friends with whom they are comfortable and then pretty much ignore everyone else. This is a type of defense mechanism.
 
But when you are in fursuit, you suddenly become an object of fascination, a fantasy character who has come to life, and this is, obviously, very appealing to a furry fan. They don’t feel intimidated anymore because your fursona is attractive and they want to get closer to you. It is also true, in my opinion, that because you are a fantasy being at this point, you are more approachable because you aren’t, in a sense, real. Therefore, you are not threatening to them, if that makes sense.
 
One of the things I enjoy about fursuiting is just this thing: it breaks down barriers. People come up to me and hug me! And they would never do that if I was just walking around as Kevin Hile. So, don’t be annoyed by people wanting to converse with you in suit; think of your fursuit, instead, as a tool for breaking down the wall between people and connecting to them. If they want to talk to you, talk back—but do it as your fursona. Keep the magic alive. That’s the fun of fursuiting!
 
Hugs,
Papabear