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It's Okay to Go Out on Your Own if You're Ready

2/9/2013

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Hey, Papa Bear.

Been an entire month since the episode with my Mom... And I'm glad to say that THAT particular problem is solved... But now I have another for you:

My mother and sister are dead-set against me going to Pennsylvania, and wish they could stop me, but know that they can't. 

They are attempting to guilt-trip me into staying here... It just tears my heart to pieces every time they berate me about my choice. They never raise their voices when they talk "with" me (One-sided bloody conversations where I'm too scared to say anything...), but nevertheless, I am wearing thin.

I am turning 18 on March Second. The end of my school year is set in June, and I plan on moving out and getting a plane ticket to PA no more than two weeks after school lets out. 

I'm hunting desperately for a job to supplement my poor savings, and I will gain control of my USAA bank accounts when I turn 18, so my mother can't lord THAT over me.

My friend, Who I'll call Quinn here, is willing to give me a place to stay until I'm comfortable enough to be on my own. He is going to help me get a job as well...

What I'm trying to say is... I'm moving to Pennsylvania, to Quinn, no matter what, but... My heart tears in two at the thought of losing the support of my family, where ever I may go... I don't know how to keep my family connection alive, If they won't even listen to my side of the story, if they won't even TRY to see things from my view... Trust me, I've tried...

Drake Wolfe.

* * *

Dear Drake,

I don’t understand. You say in one breath that you are worried about losing your family support, and in the next you say they won’t listen to you no matter how much you try. To me, that sounds like they don’t support you, so what are you afraid of?

Even if they did support you, it is perfectly possible to maintain a relationship with the family when you are away. My mother and I were very close when she was in California and I was in Michigan; now we’re both in the same state, but I still only see her about once a month, yet she is the biggest supporter in my life.

Sounds like you have a plan. Finish school; gain control of your life; move to Pennsylvania. You’ll be fine.

Good luck!

Papabear

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