Indecisive Furry Having Fursona Issues

Haya Papa Bear,

I have a problem. 

I have a very indecisive personality and it normally Isn't such a bad thing, but lately I have had so much trouble with sticking to one character as my fursona. I am never happy with it and when I finally am ... I change anyway as something will be off. It started when I changed my first real fursona who was an orange/blue/pink wolf/dog/fox/snake everything else mix named Ruby. I decided after a long time and a lot of name calling by others in the fandom to change to a more natural and not "woof" character and made a lynx named Ruby. I stuck with her for a while and even made a suit of her, but I was always changing bits like if she had a long tail or short or if she had wings or not ¬.¬ It was hell. I ended up making many more new fursonas from dog to raptor. I had to change the name as other people had picked them for me and even now with Mazzy Pan I am finding it very hard to keep her the same... I loved her as a horse but made excuses to change her like " I don't wanna be seen as a Brony, they are freaks" ¬.¬ that’s worse since I am a "Brony" myself , so I changed her to a raptor who is cute and frankly funny .... but now even thou I have said I love her .... I am finding it hard to keep her. I want to change all the time.

I can not keep changing. It's not fair on my friends who draw me. It has made it so I am a bit of a joke around people. "So what are you today?" It's so bad that when I talk to people they go throw about 5 furry names till they get to the new correct one! It's annoying ... and I don't understand why I do it all the time. Any help?

Love,

Mazzy

* * *

Dear Mazzy,

Gee, hon, having a fursona should be a fun thing, not the chore you’re turning it into. First of all, don’t worry about what other people think of your fursona. Don’t fret about whether or not they approve of the species (or mix of same), or whether you are a pony as in MLP (please note that just because you pick an equine fursona doesn’t make you a Brony), or what the name is, or color, or whether you are mythological or paleontological or a modern, real critter. This is about you, not them.

The reason many people like you are indecisive is because they are overly concerned about other people and what they think. But this is often not just a behavioral thing, but rather something that is ingrained in your biology. A study recently showed (http://www.livescience.com/6291-study-sheds-light-people-shy.html) that about 20% of the population has Sensory Perception Sensitivity (SPS). As the name implies, it makes one highly sensitive to one’s surroundings, and the sensory overload can make one shy and introverted. I’m not saying this is what is troubling you, but it might be.

But not only should you not choose a fursona because of others’ opinions, you should also not worry if you are indecisive because of how your indecision affects others.

Mazzy, first and foremost put aside all worries and guilt.

Next, try and calm your mind. Take an inventory of what you really like and don’t like. What do you like physically about a fursona character? What colors do you like? What personality traits? Don’t even worry about a species, just pick traits.

In writing classes I took in college, they sometimes did an exercise called “free writing.” This is when you just write down anything that pops into your head. The thing to do is just continue writing without pause. And don’t censor yourself. If it pops into your mind, write it. Even if it doesn’t make sense to you at first. Do this for about 10-15 minutes. Just write about furry and what you like about fursonas.

Then, put the page aside for a day. Come back to it the next day and see what you wrote. Take the features you like and then compile them into your fursona. You can look at the words on the page, too, and see if they help you come up with a name. For example, maybe you wrote words like Bright and Cheerful and could call yourself “Sunny.” Just a random possibility.

Heck, you might even invent a new species (I’m reminded of the Skiltaire, the fictional species that became the mascot of the Prancing Skiltaire party).

Try this exercise and see what you come up with ... and let me know!

Hugs,

Papabear