Felt I need at least some advice on this as it is really starting to stress me out and scare me a bit.
I'm having some school issues at the moment. I am in the IB program in my senior year and I'm getting ready for my exams and such.
The problem I have is with the IB moderator. Lately she has been on my case about every little thing and is taking every chance she gets to attack me for my work and patronize me as well. It's not that my work is bad, but I have slipped past a few Bad grades with make up summer work. Two years ago, she was helping me out with this and didn't really seem that interested. Now, my grades have improved dramatically and I'm doing very well in school right now, but she is still attacking me for not turning in my CAS (basically service) hours on a regular basis and for being behind on my Extended Essay.
She seems to ignore the fact that I update my CAS hours in bulk and once I finish with the next update, I'll only need about 40 hours left to go which should be filled up quite soon. She also seems to ignore the fact that many other IB students hardly have any hours turned in. With the 200+ hours we need, I don't think getting on my case about it is very helpful.
My EE is another story. My subject is in biology, but I have nowhere to go. My thesis problem doesn't fit well so now I'm thinking of switching subjects to history, which I should be able to do. However, I have a feeling she will not allow that, and that will be outlined shortly. The EE itself, though, is due in February, so I have enough time to write one over breaks and such.
Her actions have gotten to be very very strange lately as well. She is openly scowling at me in school hallways and the lunch room. It's freaking me out a little bit. I don't know if I did anything to insult her or what. I've hardly seen her and the one time I had a meeting with her, I've made an effort to be polite and kind.
My parents tried having a conference with her a while ago, but she ended up handing all the paperwork she had to my guidance counselor who had no idea what to do with it, and proceeded to walk out of the school and leave, passing my parents on the way and telling them the meeting was in a different room and not her office. She called me into her office the next day during school and asked if I wanted to meet. I replied I would like a meeting, but that I didn't feel prepared at the time and would rather have my parents there with me. She instead replied that she would like to get it over with and forced the meeting on me without my consent.
To be fair, she did say she was not available the day before as she had a "family emergency." Why she didn't tell my parents when she saw them is beyond my comprehension. Her brother did die a few months before, but that was about a month and a half before school started. And she was absent for the first month of school anyway.
I found out through a teacher that I am good friends with that this moderator has set up a secret agenda with my teachers and if I miss a deadline or appear to be off track of the material (a problem that has never occurred), they are required to inform her and not me. I also found out last Friday that she passed by one of my friends in the hallway and proceeded to ask if they were friends with me. When my friend replied that she was, the moderator just walked away, not saying anything. That's really creepy.
My parents are rightfully angry at her and wonder why the principal doesn't do anything. They don't seem to understand that the principal is nothing but a placeholder now. This IB moderator placed herself in a very strong position. She can get almost anyone in the school fired by appealing to the principal. I don't understand how this school could have fallen so fast. It was only a few years ago it was recognized as a Blue Ribbon school.
She's really causing me to stress out and I have no idea what to do. I have to meet her soon to discuss changing my EE subject, but I'm scared she'll say no for no other reason than I’m not doing well in the subject I have, and I'll be stuck in a subject I am having a lot of trouble with.
Also, I probably have to have a one-on-one sit down with her and ask her what her problem is with me. I'm genuinely confused and getting scared for my diploma. It will not be fair to kick me out of this program in my senior year. All the work I've done will be worthless.
So why do you think she's attacking me so much? I can understand a reason for motivation, but it's gone way past that. I already show my grades spiking, and I'm working my hardest, and I already have enough stress helping my friends out when they really need it. I don't need this extra stress and I don't think she does either.
Thanks for reading,
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This is a very odd case. I have never heard of a moderator of this type apparently wielding so much power at a school, even, according to you, having sway over the principal. So, first question would be whether she treats other students the way she treats you, or if you are her special little target. If she is just being weird with you, I find it hard to believe that it would just be because you had some problems with some classes in the past. I’m sure she would get that sort of issue all the time with other students.
Assuming you are telling me everything you know, and not holding back on something you have done to her to cause her to act like this, Papabear would guess that she is also treating other students badly, no? This would mean there is quite a performance issue involved. Why she has so much sway over all the teachers in your school, as well as administration, is beyond me. I could only speculate.
Bringing your parents into the issue (which is the correct first option) didn’t seem to work, and getting them in a meeting with the principal also seems unpromising. There are two other places you can go, however, if you have not tried to do so: 1) the Parent Teacher Association, and 2) the school board. Both have conflict resolution bodies. Talk to your parents and contact both organizations for your school.
Let me know how it goes and if more help is needed.
P.S. To my readers: It has been 30 years since I was in high school and I'm sure things have changed a lot. Since I have no children of my own, I may easily be unfamiliar with other options that might be available in the case above, so please feel free to offer suggestions. Thanks!
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