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Home-Schooled Furry Needs to Take Advantage of Furry Community to Make Friends

8/2/2015

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It's sort of a short question but I don't have anybody else to ask. So basically I don't really have any real-life friends at all. I work with adults and I'm homeschooled.

I've known my only friend for almost two years though we both live in the same location. My boyfriend however lives in another country. 

The question is how to make friends. I'm not the best at anything to get attention and I don't have any idea on how I should approach a stranger.

Mars (age 17, Florida)

* * *

Dear Mars,

Being home schooled is really no reason for not making friends, and I’m sure you haven’t been working with adults all your life. What have you been doing up until now to socialize? Even kids who go to a regular public or private school do most of their socializing outside of the classroom. The best answer is to engage in structured activities outside the home when you’re not studying. You could participate in church programs, the Girl Scouts, community programs, or even just hang out with relatives or children of your parents’ friends (unless you’re living in an isolated Florida swamp or key somewhere).

You might also be interested to know that in your state of Florida you can participate in local school programs even though you don’t attend the school itself. This is true for ten states in America, including Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Idaho, Iowa, Maine, North Dakota, Oregon, Utah, and Washington. In the other 40 states, such rules vary from school district to school district. It must be noted, though, that even in home-school-friendly states such as Florida, you need to meet certain requirements of academic achievement. Check with your local school to learn about the details.

When it comes to opportunities to expose yourself to social events and make friends, you have no excuse not to.

Now, if the issue is actually that you are a very shy person who has trouble making friends, that’s an entirely different ball of wax. I wrote a column about overcoming shyness two years ago that you can read here: http://www.askpapabear.com/letters/shy-furry-wants-to-overcome-her-fears.

In a nutshell, how does one make friends? The best way to meet people is at places where socializing is encouraged, such as at a party or at some group activity. Just go up to someone and introduce yourself. Stick out a paw and say, “Hi, I’m ____! What’s your name?” And, since you’re a furry, a good place to do that would be a furmeet or other furry event. If you haven’t already, join the Florida Furs group (http://www.floridafurs.com/) and make friends there! Sounds like you really haven’t taken advantage of being a furry, which is a huge worldwide community just waiting for you to explore!

The only thing holding you back is you!

Here’s wishing you many many many furiends,

Papabear
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