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  • Ask Papabear

He's Having Sex with His Aunt

9/4/2013

9 Comments

 
Hello Papa Bear:

My fursona says it all, I consider myself a polar bear and I've been a furry for two years more or less, the reason of why I'm asking for your advice is because I have a little problem, so I'll start by the beginning:

I live with my aunt in Seattle, my parents works a lot and (almost) the only times I can see them is on weekends, so she has been there for me whenever I needed some help and advice. I'm an art student and love it. Recently we've been having this... how can I say it... we feel this sexual attraction for each other; I know this is wrong and can't be possible but that's it.

This attraction is so strong that ended into sexual intercourse more than once; honestly, I don't know how it happened, I guess you can say that “only happened.” Of course, I haven't told my parents about it because surely they will freak out and probably might want me to stay away from my aunt but I just can't help it and love her in the romantic way more than in the familiar way.

Maybe this is the first time someone asks you about advice about cases of incest, I've been dealing with this for more than 4 months and this love for my aunt is not leaving me.

I've been having these guilty/satisfaction feelings when I'm with her, there are sometimes when we even go out as a couple but then I realize that I'm dating my aunt and minutes later I just don't care.

Can you help me with this? I mean, I need some advice, when it is normal? is it common? 

With love,

Anonymous

* * *

Dear Anonymous,

Although of course you are going to have a big problem with your family about this if they ever find out, you have a bigger problem. Incest is illegal in most states in the USA, including where you live, Washington state. The penalty for incest, which includes intercourse with a parent, sibling, one of your children, a grandparent, a niece or nephew, and, yes, an aunt or an uncle, is 14 years in Washington. Be glad you don’t live in North or South Carolina, Tennessee, Mississippi, Louisiana, Alabama, Georgia, or Florida, where you can get life in prison (interestingly, my former home state of Michigan has no problem with incest [no legal code against it, anyway]—somehow that’s not surprising to me given some of the residents I’ve seen there).

So, forgetting the morality of it, you should stop this relationship now. Your aunt is also criminally guilty and needs to be informed of this and start acting like an adult instead of having sex with her 19 year old nephew.

I’m not really going to get into the morality of this. I don’t really have to because the legalities of it should be enough incentive, I hope, for you to stop. As well as the fact of how this relationship would really create havoc within your family should it be discovered. And, trust me, it WILL be discovered if you let it continue long enough.

I would also recommend that both of you get some counseling. No, this behavior is not normal and it is not common, though it does happen. I think you are letting your hormones run away with you and control your actions; your aunt should be ashamed of herself for participating with you and encouraging you. I hope the fact that you could both go to prison will be enough to get you to stop.

Finally, I recommend that you change your living situation as soon as possible.

I hope you will listen to my advice. Good luck.

Papabear

9 Comments
Critter link
9/4/2013 12:01:05 pm

Well, for once I can disagree with the advice given. Hope that's okay.

I really don't think it's good enough to say "it's against the law, don't do it" in a case where nobody is being coerced. Nineteen is young but not a child. Both same sex and mixed race relationships were at one point against the law. Would you have told Rosa Parks to go sit in the back of the bus because it was against the law? Or those at Stonewall to not resist arrest because it was against the law?

Of course you should be aware of the legal consequences but honestly, do you think it's likely this would be prosecuted? I would hope they have better things to do.

At the end of the day, any argument one could bring against this relationship has been used to argue against other relationships that are now acceptable ("It's unnatural", "no one will accept it", "it's just too weird", "it's against the law", "it's creepy").

So my advice would be to take a breather. Don't see your aunt for at least six months, better a year or more. Make an effort to date other women. This is a way to see if this is something other than an unusual attraction.

If after you've done that you both really feel this is a relationship you must have, maybe you should move to Michigan. Be prepared to have this relationship accepted by virtually nobody in mainstream life, you would likely have to remain closeted forever.

Honestly, I'll bet after your time out you will put this behind you.

Reply
Papabear
9/4/2013 01:40:11 pm

Hi, Critter. You're correct that incest cases are rarely prosecuted. You are also correct in saying that just because it's illegal now doesn't mean it's wrong (and you give the case of Rosa Parks). Both are good points.

Okay, maybe I dropped the ball on this one by trying to take the easy way out and just note their criminal behavior. There are other reasons this relationship should not continue. For one thing, as I mentioned in my response, it would really tear the family apart, perhaps destroying sibling and parent relationships permanently. On a biological sense, if they did continue the relationship to the point of having children, it is well established that mating between people closely related increases the chances for birth defects in children. A third reason is, quite frankly, I believe the relationship is based on a young man being horny and being placed alone in the home of a woman he finds attractive. Instinct kicks in, and he wants to have sex with her. She, being older and obviously alone, gives in because she enjoys a young man's attentions. This is not the foundation for a solid relationship.

In the end, of course, we both advise him to not live with his aunt. So, Critter, if you're not against the relationship, why tell them to split up? You believe that he'll just grow out of the phase and move on? Perhaps. I really didn't want to offer that option to him.

I am guilty on this one in being lazy with my answer, however. The main reason is that the incestuous relationship will likely destroy this writer's family once it comes out. The other reason is I strongly believe this relationship is born of a young man's libido that was set free by the opportunity to have sex with a woman who doesn't care about the consequences of her actions but is old enough that she should have.

Reply
sam
3/4/2014 07:07:48 pm

i was going through same problem of attracted by aunt and even after my parents has discovered our relationship and are very upset angry about me. what to do??

Reply
Papabear
3/5/2014 04:02:15 am

Hi, Sam. If you would like to write me about this, feel free.

Reply
kenny link
5/3/2014 02:23:06 pm

Iv fantasized about doin my au t I'm mid 20s she's almost 60. Nd there is somthing there between us we know it. We never talked about it but things hav been obvious I pinched some lace panties for me to sniff lol I know they got seen but just let me keep em haha, there must b a reason y we wanna no one else excites me In my family and my aunt is gettin on too.lol holiday to her house this year nd I'm gunna. Pile on the charms lol. I reckon its cuming hope its not too much, its just pure lust. So I think kamagra in her drink aunt n nephew porn on the pc. And I think I'll just grab her then.finally release the beast iv got for her.lol

Reply
Man
12/28/2017 07:26:43 pm

Me and my aunt have been going through a little bit of intamisey throughout the years. I am also in mid-early 20's. It's more love between us two than lust. We both have no kids, a lot of common interests, and I share a quarter of her kromazones. So it's not full incest if something were to happen between us two.

Reply
Papabear
12/29/2017 09:50:02 pm

Well, technically, it depends on the state. In Arkansas, for example, sex with an aunt or uncle IS consider incest. Also, you don't have to be a blood relative. Sex with an adopted child is considered incest under the law, too. So, it is tricky ground.... If you really wish to know, look up the laws in your state or country.

Reply
Ted
10/22/2019 04:28:50 am

It's my birthday this week and I'll be 34 years old. My mother passed 10 years ago and my auntie's the only person in my maternal family that I've kept in contact with. My 65 year old aunt's a married mother of two, her husband works away often and her children have long since left home. I've never had a girlfriend and even though I'm good in my own company I get very lonely, I've been in despair lately. There is no end in sight to my problem which has affected my mental health and professional life. As a way of coping I abuse alcohol and my self harm's escalated to the point on two occasions in the last month where I felt my life's been at risk.

My auntie's quite open talking about sex and relationships and whenever we speak she always asks if I've got a girlfriend; I always lie to her and say I have but the next time she asks I'm going to tell her the truth - I've never had one. The thing is I'm so attracted to her, I've wanted to have sex with her for several years and the feelings won't go away, I've given it chance. I'm in complete lust with her but I love her so much too, I've never loved a woman before. I feel if we had a sexual relations, especially with a woman I love, it would take the edge off my problem. When I masturbate over the thought of us in bed together I have the most intense orgasms. It's probably the taboo element to the thoughts I'm thinking but I think the sex would be beneficial to my aunt and make her feel good. I have suspicions her husband doesn't give her the attention she needs and deserves. My aunt's invited me around to her house (we'd be alone) for the night on a number of occasions so we could spend time together but I declined her offer because I didn't want to act on my feelings. Thankfully that's no longer my concern concluding we only live once and this could be an incredible relationship.

So that's my situation, I've weighed up the pros and cons and I'm going to arrange a meeting with her and hope she'll accept my offer of relations. I'll take her some gifts for our date. I know this could go wrong but I feel the worst that could happen is that she gets offended and cuts me out, the pro is a wonderful relationship with my beautiful aunt.

There's no real question to this I just wanted to air my situation and views.

Reply
Elliot
1/10/2022 02:06:16 pm

Wow this feels like it was me who wrote this... Can relate alot.
Can I ask Did anything happen??

Reply



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