Furry Is Troubled by Sexual Desires

Dear Papabear,

On days that I have too much free time on my hands, casual Internet browsing led me down an unfortunate road. First, I read one of your letters, and I felt aroused. Then, browsing e621, curiosity killed the cat, and I ended up enjoying these artworks.

Am I just being influenced by the pornography I've looked at, or is something fundamentally wrong with me? If the latter is true, how do I remedy it?

​Thank you.

Sergio

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Dear Sergio,

Furporn is just one form of sexual fantasy. Sexual fantasies are a window into exploring our sexual pleasures and identities, and they can also be a way of assuaging our feelings of guilt about our sexuality. Why do we have sexual fantasies? Well, when it comes to young people, their heads are floating in a bouillabaisse of testosterone or estrogen in which practically anything is a turn on LOL. Fantasies also have us dreaming of becoming more sexually attractive or arousing than we think we are in real life, or they might resolve sexual needs that are not being satisfied in real life, or they might be a way to "spice up" a current sexual relationship that has gotten a bit, shall we say, routine or humdrum.

Anthropomorphized animal characters can be attractive to us because they express animalistic urges and needs. The symbolism is pretty clear. Animals strut about all the time sans clothing, and often we crave the physical freedom of being without clothes. Also, animals are not restrained by the sexual politics and social restrictions of human society. If they feel like screwing, and they can find a partner, they will screw with abandon. (Reminds me of a joke: How many microfurs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just the usual two, but the trick is getting them inside the lightbulb!)

Many furries find the fandom because of furporn, which is typically discovered online, but sometimes in comic book stores, too. I know I found it through Reed Waller and Kate Worley's Omaha, the Cat Dancer (although that is more erotica than furporn). Furporn not only serves as a release of sexual tension but can also be a way to safely explore our sexual curiosity, including experimenting with gender, in ways that "normal" society would frown upon. Hence, it can serve as a safe place to discover who we are as sexual beings. (It also has the advantage of keeping one safe from STDs and pregnancy).

Do not be ashamed of such exploration. It doesn't mean you're a pervert. It means that you are exploring the physical side of yourself. In a way, furporn has some parallels with horror films: they both get us excited (in different ways), get the adrenalin rushing, while reassuring ourselves that we are safe and sound.

My advice, then, is don't fret about it. After a while (by "while," I mean probably a couple of years), you'll probably lose some interest in furporn as the novelty of it wears off. Hopefully, too, you will find yourself in a healthy physical and emotional relationship by then, and you won't be too tied up in furporn. However, you might still find it helpful to give you ideas about what to do in bed for fun.

Hope this reassures you, Sergio.

Bear Hugs,
Papabear