Dear Papabear,
See, a Fat fur called "Tom," an encourager on FA, called me out as a fat hater all because I don't want to gain weight in real life. I had his journal pulled, but the damage was done and I lost a lot of friends, including my friend "Mike.” My question is, should I stop being a Fat fur and stop posting my padded Fursuit? Silver * * * Hi, Silver, Tom is being illogical in saying you are a “fat hater” because you are concerned about your health and want to lose weight. That’s number 1. Number 2 is that it is perfectly viable to love fat people while not being fat yourself. These people are typically called “chasers” in the gay community. Number 3, your so-called “friend” Mike dumping you because of this proves that he was never really your friend (sorry to inform you of that). True friends stick by you, are concerned about you, and don’t dump you because some third party flames you with things that are not even true. So, in brief: Tom? Not a friend. Mike? Not a friend. Silver, I’m sure there must be people in your life who support you and would not treat you like Tom and Mike and, apparently, some other people have. Those are the ones who are your friends and the ones you need to keep by your side. As for your fursona? You want your fursona to be fat? Cool with Papabear. My own fursona is a half ton heavier than the real McCoy. Fursonas are, by definition, not a reflection of your real physical self. I mean, should I unfriend a dragon scaley because IRL he doesn’t have wings? Ridiculous. I even know furries who have fursonas that are not even the same gender, let alone weight, as the person behind the fur. Be who you want to be in real life: thin human being; be who you want to be as a fursona: fat furry. And when you find people in your life who like you in both ways, then you have found your friends. Be Happy, Papabear
10 Comments
Yogi
3/27/2013 04:01:32 am
Thanks Papabear for reminding people to be who they are and realize what a true friend is
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Dotas
3/27/2013 04:11:42 am
If what your 'friend' Toom says is true, that you have to be fat to have a fat fursona, then I would only be able to have a bear as my character. My fursona is a wolf. I've got three other characters. A dragon, Fox, and German Shepherd. No bear in that list anywhere.
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3/27/2013 04:56:31 am
This really ruffles my fur! Absolutely absurd behavior on the part of those so called "friends". Outside of the furry fandom I'm constantly chastised for being overweight. And my fursuits look awful as well because of my weight compared to other fursuits (I'm trying to improve their fit). Over sized stuffed exaggerated fursuits are the norm, including inflatable ones, I know of several. It's part of the fandom. Those so called friends need to learn what our fandom truly is all about!
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Alex
3/27/2013 08:40:50 am
Very sound advice
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Brownee
3/27/2013 12:25:08 pm
Being Fat Don,t mean I hate You. There are lots of furs who will tried to make other mad. But You can ignore them. Yeah i have some furs who hates me cause i,m a mascot performer.
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This is a load of heaping BS. He shouldn't be told what he can or can't do. If we wants to be that way, let him. It's the reflection of him. Like Papa Bear said- People don't have wings, and a lot of people don't even go by their own gender.
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3/29/2013 07:17:52 am
hey man i'm a big guy and you know what i'm fine with you being a fatfur even if your not fat if your friends have a problem with it they aren't really friends as papabear said i have 2 sonas myself a wolfman with wings and a white bear body builder and if you need a new friend i'm here for you
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10/20/2013 07:07:19 pm
hey husband i'm a gross male moreover you recognize what i'm pretty beside you actuality a fatfur regular if your nay fatty if your playmates permit a enigma among it they aren't indeed buddys as papabear said i support 2 sonas myself a wolfman accompanying wounds plus a colorless bear corpse maker further if you demand a untried companion i'm here for you.
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Sergie
11/7/2017 05:00:34 am
you should not let these jerk wads dictate what you can and cannot do
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Alec
7/26/2018 02:16:58 am
I have a few friends online who are fat furs. It helps they're nice to talk to. Being genuinely kind and empathetic matters to me. I'm glad you see it that way, Papa Bear.
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A note on comments: Comments on letters to Papabear are welcome, especially those that offer extra helpful advice and add something to the conversation that is of use to the letter writer and those reading this column. Also welcome are constructive criticisms and opposing views. What is NOT welcome are hateful, hurtful comments, flaming, and trolling. Such comments will be deleted from this site. Thank you.
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