I...just need help figuring out what to do. I have just started the 16th year of my life and I have gotten myself into a relationship with a girl. My problem with this is that she wants to have sex and do other things...I am all for doing this with her but at the same time my moral code doesn't let me do this. I just need advice on what I should do to satisfy her needs without breaking my morals (my morals are the standard morals of most religions).
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I’m not sure what the “other things” are, so let’s just talk about the sex. Papabear is certain that your 16-year-old body is “all for doing this.” Hormones are dictating your desire to have sex. On the other hand, your sense of morals is holding you back. Many people feel it is not moral to have sex at such an early age and before marriage, and Papabear respects that. Your girlfriend should to.
It is not right for your girlfriend to pressure you to have sex any more than it is for you to pressure her. You need to explain to her that your sense of morals makes you very uncomfortable with the idea of having intercourse right now. I’m not sure by your letter whether you are in love with this person or just dating. If you are just dating and don’t even know whether you love her, all the more reason not to have sex. If you love her, tell her so, but also say that you would like to wait before you take it to that level.
If she loves you, she will respect that and wait. If she just wants sex, she’ll probably dump you. If that’s the case, you’re better off. Go find a girlfriend who loves you for you and doesn’t see you as just a walking penis.
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