Hello, I have a situation going about that I'm just not sure what to do.
I have a friend (21) that I've met online on furaffinity, and while we haven't really met each other in person, we've really hit it on online, and almost talk to each other on Skype.
Until now, I've always been there for my friend, especially even when he was going through hard times. But now, he rarely talks to me, and initiating conversation goes nowhere, where we only say a few sentences to each other... and that's it.
When I asked him if anything was going on, he mentioned how he can't really speak to me all the time, and how busy he is during this summer. That's fine, he's an adult and has his job to attend to, seems like no issue, right?
But, on the popular digital gaming platform, Steam, I always see him either chatting it up with friends and even playing games with them. As for me, nothing.
When I asked again, I was told the same thing, and how worrisome I am. After this, it's been the same, him playing and speaking with his friends while in conversations with me, we can barely can keep up a conversation.
At this point, I'm just about ready to just yell at him, but, what if he's right? Am I thinking about this too hard, or am I justified about being worried?
A Worrisome Fur (age 17)
* * *
Dear Worrisome,
In such situations, Papabear finds that it is wise to listen to one’s instincts. I don’t think you’re being paranoid or overthinking the evidence here, which indicates pretty strongly that, for some reason, this person has become bored with you or otherwise lost interest.
In my experience it usually isn’t worth your time and energy to obsess about such things, to pursue them relentlessly, and to be otherwise troubled by them. Sometimes friendships work out, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes you find a friend for life, other times two one-time friends drift apart.
That’s life.
I see people do what you’re doing all the time, fretting about “What did I do wrong?” Well, probably nothing. Usually, the problem is the other person, not you. There’s nothing wrong with you, the other guy just isn’t A-list-quality friend material. You tried to reconnect, and you’ve been met with indifference.
He’s moved on, and so should you.
Blessed Be,
Papabear
I have a friend (21) that I've met online on furaffinity, and while we haven't really met each other in person, we've really hit it on online, and almost talk to each other on Skype.
Until now, I've always been there for my friend, especially even when he was going through hard times. But now, he rarely talks to me, and initiating conversation goes nowhere, where we only say a few sentences to each other... and that's it.
When I asked him if anything was going on, he mentioned how he can't really speak to me all the time, and how busy he is during this summer. That's fine, he's an adult and has his job to attend to, seems like no issue, right?
But, on the popular digital gaming platform, Steam, I always see him either chatting it up with friends and even playing games with them. As for me, nothing.
When I asked again, I was told the same thing, and how worrisome I am. After this, it's been the same, him playing and speaking with his friends while in conversations with me, we can barely can keep up a conversation.
At this point, I'm just about ready to just yell at him, but, what if he's right? Am I thinking about this too hard, or am I justified about being worried?
A Worrisome Fur (age 17)
* * *
Dear Worrisome,
In such situations, Papabear finds that it is wise to listen to one’s instincts. I don’t think you’re being paranoid or overthinking the evidence here, which indicates pretty strongly that, for some reason, this person has become bored with you or otherwise lost interest.
In my experience it usually isn’t worth your time and energy to obsess about such things, to pursue them relentlessly, and to be otherwise troubled by them. Sometimes friendships work out, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes you find a friend for life, other times two one-time friends drift apart.
That’s life.
I see people do what you’re doing all the time, fretting about “What did I do wrong?” Well, probably nothing. Usually, the problem is the other person, not you. There’s nothing wrong with you, the other guy just isn’t A-list-quality friend material. You tried to reconnect, and you’ve been met with indifference.
He’s moved on, and so should you.
Blessed Be,
Papabear
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