A Furry Is Feeling Isolated . . .

Ok... I have a bit of a problem, I guess. Often when I am online I find myself getting severely depressed. Mostly wondering why, but I think I know. I believe it has to do with not felling like I fit in or I have little to nothing in common with most furs. I dunno. I live in a rather small-ish area and I have no real "fur" support group or many "normal" friends. I dunno, I'm usually at some level of depression. Is there anything that you could tell me that may help me?

Bucky

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Dear Bucky,

It sounds to Papabear as if you’re dealing with two things here: chronic depression and your difficulty fitting into the furry community when you are living in an isolated area. Whether or not the two problems are related, Papabear isn’t sure, but let’s see what we can do here.

First of all, your feeling that you have “nothing in common with most furs.” The only thing furries have in common with each other is their love of anthropomorphic characters. Although there is a preponderance of teen and twenty-something white furries, for the most part  they are about as diverse a group as you can find. Pretty much every religion, socioeconomic level, education level, race, sexual orientation, and species interest is represented.

Papabear does not know what your particular background is, but I’m sure there must be some furries who are similar to you in some way and/or share interests with you. One thing you can do is look for them on places like Facebook and Furry4Life, both of which have a number of specialized groups. Papabear belongs to groups specializing in greymuzzles, bears, gay furs, and pagan furs, for example.  If you don’t find a group for you, you can start one that is appropriate for you and then put the word out about it to try and get people to join you. 

This can help you in the virtual world, but then there is also the real world. Geographical isolation can be a problem, especially if you don’t have the means to travel very far. Have you tried finding a local furmeet group. There is a site (http://furries.meetup.com/) that I wish more people would take advantage of. There are only 16 groups on it at the moment, but you could try starting your own meetup group in your area.

The gist of this is that you might have to take some initiative on your own to form a kernel of a furry group that meets your personalized needs.

If the cause of your depression is your lack of connection, Papabear hopes that some of the above advice may help you. If, though, your depression is caused by something else, then please write again and provide more detail about yourself, and I’d be happy to write a follow-up to you.

Bear Hugs,

Papabear