Kavalame! A Message to My Readers for the Holidays

​Dear Furiends,

To all of those who will be spending their holidays and New Year with friends and family, you are blessed, and I wish you a wonderful Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa/Yule or whatever occasion you enjoy.

But this message is for all of those who are lonely, sick, depressed, or broke this year. Papabear understands. This is a rough year for many, including me. I lost my sister and a good friend this year; I lost my dog, Ernie, last year. And it's hard to celebrate New Year's knowing that an insane, senile, narcissistic dictator will sit in the White House AGAIN in 2025. Anger and hostility and rabid nationalism are on the rise in America (encouraged and enflamed by the Orange Cancer), and it will affect the furry community in a bad way, guaranteed (which is why it pisses this bear off when furries attack their own fandom; we have enough trouble with the normies and don't need you to add to it).

These are troubling times.

Frankly, if you are succumbing to despair, I feel for you. To be honest, Christmas brings this bear little joy anymore. I sent out dozens of Christmas cards this year (as I do every year), and do you know how many I got? Five. And one of those was from my insurance guy. My sister has succumbed to alcoholism and has become a TERF, a hater, like so many in this country, and she has cut me out of her life and won't even talk to me. I also lost my dear friend, Dineegla Moose, just as he was getting ready to attend MFF, and earlier this year, we all lost Mark Merlino, a key founder of this fandom if not the man singly most responsible for its existence.

I have decorated, and cooked, and spent a buttload of money on gifts as I do every Christmas, but there is little joy in it for me, I confess, and certainly no return on my efforts except for one gift under the tree from my hubby (the last person in my life who is really in my life), and I already know what it is ... so ... no surprises (but that's okay, my love). I'm feeling a lot of empathy for Ebenezer Scrooge, honestly. I miss the joy of my childhood Christmases so much that my heart aches, a past filled with family and cheesy Christmas decorations and cat and dog companions; a holiday of claymation TV shows and saccharine holiday specials; a time when I wasn't worried about inflation and my withering income's inability to meet expenses and global warming.

If you're like me, you probably sometimes fantasize about giving Christmas the middle finger right up Santa's butthole.

But here's the thing, my dear troubled readers.

The world needs you not to give up.

Because if we all give in to the dark monster of despair, we will never recover from this downward spiral we are currently in.

This is why I still do what I do. It is why I continue this column; it is why I work on my Facebook groups for Greymuzzles and Silvermuzzles; it is why I run the Good Furry Awards; it is why I get up each morning and take care of my 76-year-old husbear and all his needs. That's what Santa does. He doesn't do his worldwide labors for plaudits and rewards. He does it because the world needs a little joy and wonder.

So, I am asking all of you: Be like Santa. I know it's hard, but we need to step up when no one else will and keep the light on and the flames glowing and the noms baking in the oven.

Because if we don't do it, who will?

I'm not asking you to spend money and wrap a bunch of gifts. I'm asking you to be a good friend to others, whether these are family members or coworkers or classmates or dear pets. Give people hugs. Be polite to others. Give a parking spot in a crowded lot to someone else. Give someone a compliment on their appearance or something they have done. Tell a joke to lighten the mood. Share your cookies. Every little thing counts.

Recently, I watched the movie Red One. If you haven't seen it, the center of the story is that Santa's chief ELF worker, Callum Drift (played by the endearing Dwayne Johnson) feels like retiring after about five centuries of service because all the humans around him seem petty and selfish and without Christmas spirit. Santa is then kidnapped by the Christmas Witch, Grýla (a figure from Icelandic folklore, in case you wondered), who believes, like Krampus, that the world would be a better place if all the nasty humans were punished instead of being given joy as Santa believes. Long story short, she is defeated (not a spoiler; it's a Christmas movie), and Callum regains his spirit of Christmas.

A key to the defeat of the witch is Santa commanding his reindeer with the single word: KAVALAME!

What the heck does kavalame mean? This is not really explained in the movie, but the word is a very clever device by the writers. Interestingly, it is not from Norse mythology (much of Christmas lore has northern European roots) but from Greek. Kavala was an important city in ancient Greece, and St. Nicholas was of Greek descent. More on point, though, is kavalame's connection to the Sanskrit word kavalam, meaning "only" and key to the phrase baba nam kavalam, meaning "only the name of the beloved," or more poignantly, "love is all there is." 

Or, as the Beatles sang, "All you need is love."

Love defeats the nasties out there like Grýla and Krampus.

For Christmas, dear readers, that is my gift to you: Love. I am entrusting it to you because it is a precious gift. It is also a magical gift because you can give it to others over and over and, like Willie Wonka's everlasting gobstopper, it never runs out.

Because in the end, despite the crass commercialism of modern Christmas, the hordes of Christmas shoppers clogging the roads and malls, the political turmoil, the social unrest spread by the Convicted Felon Doofus "President," the wars and pollution and hate that seems all around us, there is one thing they can never steal from you, and that is the love in your heart.

I love you furs. And I love this fandom. And as long as I have breath in my lungs and blood in my veins, I will be here for you if you need me.

Yours in Bear Spirit,

Papabear

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